Control

I would rather have a conversation with someone, a deep conversation with someone about a subject. Rather than just attemping to type an entire blog about one single thing. In my opinion, I give really good advice. It is something that God has gifted me with. When my friends come to me with a problem, I just start talking. I can feel the holy spirit overwhelming me and doing the talking for me. Half of the time i dont know where these words of advice are coming from. Within i guess. The holy spirit fills my heart and head with words that help my friends. I have a friend, well my best friend, and he has told me that with the simplest things I can make him smile. I dont take the credit for it, my actions are a result of me just trying to be like Christ. Which leads me into another thought..
If we are suppose to be like Christ.. then why in the world do we continue to watch the thigns we do. Something that God has been laying on my heart for a while i guess is that I go to the movies like any normal person. Now, I have thought that im different, and its not bad for me to go see movies that have, who knows how many cuss words in them, because it doesnt effect me. I dont cuss. And i dont feel the pressure or temptaion to cuss. I frankly do not like it. Its foul and rude. And you would never hear Jesus saying half the stuff that comes out of many peoples mouths these days. I had a talk about this with my mom over the weekend and I had said to her that, I dont know what to do? Should i stop going to see movies that have foul language? And i argued that I just want to be a light to the non-believers. I want to set an example for others, saying that anything is possible through Christ. It is possible to hear cussing and not cuss yourself. My friend and i were talking about this and she said that it didnt matter to her if she saw those movies because it doesnt effect her. I later went on to say that I didnt want to have the wrong influence on a person, I say im a christian, but i go see the movies that even those who dont believe in Christ go see. I dont want to be judged, so why put myself into a position where that is possible to happen? Why would i go to an eviorment where i am willingly going to see a movie that has cussing in it that i dont approve of? And this is the conclusion i came up with.. I will be selective of the movies i go see. I will read reviews given by christian critics. Jesus hung out with the taxers, the theifs, the drunks, and the unfaithful. And yes, maybe that made people talk, but at least he got them talking. They would ask, why is it that he claims to be perfet yet he is hanging out with 'them'? It is because for the same reason i can go into a movie that has cussing... because it is will not have an effect on me. With Christ with me, and in my life, i know that he can help me overcome anything. I am not tempted to cuss. With Gods help i have control over the words that come out of my mouth. I trust that with God with me, i can put myself in a room with people who are all different from me, and watch the same movie, but know that i can have the control to be like Jesus and just be an example.

Help

Just sitting here in the learning center at Ridgewood Elementry, aka, my work! lol. I spend every morning and every afternoon at this school. Some times, i jut want to be able to not come in for work, or take a day off. I usually go down every wednesday night after work to Heritage Weslyn Church, to see my best friend Kael for a little while before I go to my church, Edgewood Baptist, for awana. Well tonight im Super excited!! Because i get to go down and stay all night! For the whole service! I havent been able to stay for a whole night in months, since i started working, and then awana at my church! So that makes me happy! Kael is just amazing, I have known him for: 1 year, 2 months, and 3 weeks tomorrow! We have came through Alot together and we know that it was only by God that we are in each others lives. Im so proud of him! Ive watched him grow soo much in the past year! Everything he does is for God! He is constantly doing things that are pleasing to God. He is so involved with his church now, and the people in it. He is a middle school leader, he drums for the service wednesday nights(sometimes sundays), he prays for the kids everyday. I could keep going, but im not going to, lol. He is a leader, and others look up to him, and he looks to God :) I know that kael will only continue to grow closer to God, and he will be wonderful things for Him. And im blessed to be able to witness it all.
I guess that my one wish, or goal in life, is to of course, live a life that is pleasing to God, but to also leave a legacy. How will people remember me? I want to be the person you can come to. Whether that be to just listen, or for advice. I want people to know that when they come to me, i will have my arms and ears open. I love people, and even more, i love helping people. When i help people, it doesnt even feel like its me, I have the feeling of something helping me with my adivce, or counsle. Its the holy spirit flowing through me, i know it! God gave me a passion for people! And a passion for whats going on in their lives. If there is any way i can help someone, i take that oppurtunitey and go for it! I want to help them see God, and the good that can come from a bad situation. I want to be that light in the dark for them. I pray that to God, to put people in my life that i can have a good influence on. That means that i also pray for wisdom. So when im giving advice, i know what God would say. I dont like the attention on me to begin with, so the fact that i have a heart for people, helps me focus on them and their issues, and not on mine. That isnt always the best way to deal with things, but as long as i get to help others, im happy! So i guess, when i pray to God, I just say, that I want Him to use me, whatever he wants me to do, Ill do it. I want him to continue bringing people into my life for me to help. Help me shine for Him, even if its hard... I love God with all my heart! He has control of all of me! And is the best feeling ever! I cant wait till Heaven!

Focus

For some people, dating helps them find the qualities that they want for their future wife/husband...but i dont want to go through a million guys. Im leaving my future in Gods hands. He will bring me who he wants me to be with. Ive been praying for God to bring me that One guy, the one im suppose to marry. I personally do not want to go through all the heartache that many go through. See.. I will only think about dating someone, if I can see that guy as a potential husband. Some may say thats stupid, and/or crazy. But in the long run, Im just saving myself the trouble from going guy to guy. Although, if a guydoes enter my life, I pray about it. I want God to show me if i could have a future with him. Ive had one boyfriend. And have been single for almost the past 4 years. Ive used the last few years to spend alot of time with God, strenghtening my relationship with Him. Its what i needed to do. God did put in our hearts though, the need for someone else, hence marriage. But I believe that if we are patient He will show us who is the right one for each of us. We need to be patient, and not just go around "dating for Jesus" ..meaning, going out and dating someone under the impression of saving them. Why dont you just be freinds with that person first, save them for God, and then if you are still wanting to date them, and see a possible future with them, then date. Our focus should be on God, and pleasing Him. Not on someone else. If you are spending so much time with another person, and forgetting, or not even aknowledging God, then youre not really a true Christ follower. You are not living out your beliefes. The belief that says ou relationship with Him is the most importand relationship, and the most valuable. God send Jesus to die for us, he deserves our undefined attention! He should be our first priority. Keep your eyes focused on the Lord, and not of things of this world. Be seeking His will for your life, not what you want. Being single is a gift from God, use that time to put all your attention on the Lord. Gods was is focused first on or relationship with Him, then our own lifestyle, and then seeking a "significant other"...The worlds model says that you will not be happy until you find "the one". The "one" you need to find is God!

Jeremiah 29:11-13

Today at 11:00am, me and two really good friends of mine, Melissa (Mis) and Jenna, at panera for lunch. We spent the whole time talking about work, and school, and the guys in our lives haha! But one subject that we just found ourselves talking about alot was our future. Where we were planning on gonig after Blackhawk? What we were going to major in? Where we wanted to live? As im sitting there listening and conversing with them on this topic, i realize that Mis and Jenna are really freaking out about their futures. And as i hear the things they are worrying about, im thinking to myself, and also saying outloud, that Im not scared about my life. Im not worrying. I began to think, well why am i not scared? Why am i so calm about all of this? And then Duh! a light went off im my head..Im not worried because i know that God has a plan for me! Jeremiah 29:11 says: " For I know the plans I have for you," says the Lord. "They are plans for good and not for disaster, to give you a future and a hope." ..See, i know that God has a plan and a purpose for me, and you. He keeps his promises! Our lives have already been planned out. He knows every single thing going on in your life today, and where you will be 5 years from now. But the scripture doesnt end there. It goes on in verse 12 saying: "In those days when you pray, I will listen." ..Meaning that it takes just more than having a knowledge and understanding that God has it all under control. You have to then continue to ask Him for guidence. Ask him for His plan/will for your life. You then have to not only talk to Him about what He wants you to do with your life, but then in return, you must listen. Listen to what He says. Verse 13 says: "If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me."... If a man listens to God, and hears what He says, and then does not do it, to Him, it is sin. Knowing what God wants from us, and then turning it down, is a huge slap in the face to God. Its basically us saying to Him that, yeah thats a nice plan that you have for me God, but i think that this would be better. We try to talk God into what WE want. Thats not the way to go. You have to be willing to do what He wants, and to do it the way He wants it done. I am constantly seeking Gods approval for what I do. I always pray that He gives me guidance for what He wants me to do. I say everyday to God, "Here i am Lord send me! I am willing to do what you want me to do. Where you lead me, I will follow. Whatever it is, i know you are with me. And i know you will never leave me, or bring me to a situation that we cannot handle Together!" So, while others seem to be stressing about what life is going to bring their way, Im sitting calmly, waiting for Gods instructions. Ill take one day at a time. Donig everything for God, and with God! Where he leads me, I will follow. With my whole heart, i belive that God wants the best for everyone! I live for the one and the only true God!

Too much? Not if it's for His glory

Going into college i knew was going to be different that high school. That was a given. But i didnt think about eveything that im taking on, and how i would be able to keep that up. Im awak at 5am-some nights, past midnight. I dont have any breaks. Im constantly going. Im taking 5 classes [16 hours of school], i work every morning & evey afternoon[night]. Plus i work every saturday morning. Also, haha, i am at church basically all day on sunday, and then ive got my LifeGroup monday nights, and Awana on wednesday nights. Woo! Im running on like 5 hours of sleep a night, and i dont make it up on the weekends. i feel like i should be able to take a nap, but i never do. Im not complaining, Im really not. God has given this life to me, and im just trying to live it up for him. Im just trying to live a life that is pleasing to him. Ill do whatever God calls me to do. And right now, im doing the best i can. I am reading my bible daily, because when i go a day without reading, i feel lost and like i betrayed God. Which, i did. My prayer life, is not where it should be. Ive fallen asleep on God one too many times. My priority right now is God. And focused on what He wants from me, and what would please Him, and bring Him the glory He deserves. To be glorified [for those who dont know what that means..] is to be help to the most highest. God is at the top of my ladder. Im always striving for more from Him. Alhough i struggle with saying aloud how im feeling, thats what i love about God. He can read my thoughts! So when im having a hard time getting out how i feel, i can explain it in full to God. im not perfect, and never will be. But when i see God in heaven, I want to hear Him say to me..God the creator of the universe, say to Me, a sinner, "well done, thy good and faithful servent!"
Well people, this little one has to get to bed. Early rising tomorrow.. Ill write again soon. have a great day. God bless you!

The Joy Within

I'm in a monday night LifeGroup. Its held at my college pastors house, where he and his wife lead the womens, and mens study. For the past month, we've basically just focused on becoming closer with one another, and the way that we did that was, we shared our testimonies. I had to share mine two weeks ago..honestly, i could have done a better job of informing the girls on what my life really is, and how it is now, but ehh no biggie. But tonight, a few of the girls and myself were talking about some things that had just been going on in their lives and things, and i had to just come out and tell them the truth. I had to say that guys, you know what, I really havnt had many struggles in my life, YES ive had trials thrown my way, but ive never blamed God for any of it. Ive never doubted God, ive always trusted in Him. Ive lived for Him my whole life, although i was saved at age 10, ive always been the good girl. Never done anything bad, havent rebeled against my parents. I love going to church, worshiping the Lord is everything to me. I find Joy in everything, even the bad situations. Its just how God made me. I can just feel Gods presence everywhere! Besides when im worshiping, the time that i can really feel God, is when im standing in the sun! Ha its completly random i know! But true. I could stand in the sun for hours. God has just given me so much Joy and happiness, the only thing that i can do is smile and think about how awesome he is. I knwo that God brings us to the storms in life, but he stays with us as we walk through them. No matter how long it takes for it to clear...Also, God doesnt waste pain. He uses everything that we go through to help us in Some way in the long run. Even if we cant see the reason now, or see what good it is, believe me, there is a reason for everything..

Well everyone, this was my first blog, it is now 1:12 am. And i have to get up for work at 5! So im going to hit the hay sack! If you have any questions about my faith, or comments, please feel free to ask/say them! Im an open book!

Have a great day & ill be sure to write again soon. God bless.